December 18, 2024

‘Hugger of New Jersey’ Legionnaire fights cancer with advocacy, positivity, Buddy Checks

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‘Hugger of New Jersey’ Legionnaire fights cancer with advocacy, positivity, Buddy Checks

Mary Jo Burkhard of Howell was diagnosed with pancreatic cancer and has been uplifted by phone calls, standing ovations and hugs from Legionnaires. 

Mary Jo Burkhard is a testament to advocacy, positivity and American Legion Buddy Checks.

She is a cancer survivor, thanks to not ignoring abnormal symptoms, exuding positivity when physical and mentally exhausted from chemotherapy, and being uplifted by her Legion Family from phone calls and hospital visits.  

In January 2023, Burkhard was experiencing pain in her chest and lower back. Thinking it was a heart attack, she visited urgent care and was told it was a back spasm. Burkhard was sent home with a painkiller that made her throw up. Not wanting to take another pill, she checked herself into the emergency room. Tests were run, including a CAT scan, and it was then that she learned what was really going on.

Pancreatic cancer – the third leading cause of cancer death in the United States, according to the National Cancer Institute, because there are no symptoms for it.

“‘I'm going to die,’” thought Burkhard, a member of Post 266 in Howell, N.J. “That's the first thing that came in my head because, you know, with pancreatic cancer whenever you hear about it it's always stage 4 and there's nothing they can do.”

But Dr Alexander Itskovich at the Statesir Cancer Center at CentraState in Freehold Township, N.J., reassured her that it was stage 2 and treatable with chemotherapy, radiation and removal of the mass. So began an aggressive treatment of chemotherapy every three days for the next four and a half months.

“They called (the chemotherapy) a cocktail. I didn’t like their cocktail. I’d rather have another cocktail,” Burkhard said jokingly. “It made me sick. I slept like I never slept so much in my life. It made me weak, made my hair come out. It was a mess, and I just kept good thoughts and took things one day at a time.”

Burkhard’s adult children took care of her during this time, along with her American Legion Family.

At the time of her diagnosis, Burkhard was The American Legion Monmouth County commander. She still attended meetings while wearing a chemotherapy pack both day and night. When Legionnaires asked why she was there, her response was, “If I felt good, and I could do it, I would. If I can’t, I won’t. That was my thought for everything.”

It was that attitude of not giving up on her volunteer efforts that Dr. Itskovich liked about Burkhard.

“My doctor said he loves my outlook on things, and he loves my positivity, and he calls me his favorite patient. I said, ‘Well, what am I going to do? Just sit here and say, woe is me and then crawl up in a hole and die?’ That doesn’t make any sense. I like working with The American Legion, and they helped me through a lot. They always had me on the ‘Mary Jo watch’. Somebody was always looking out for me.”

The “Mary Jo watch” included hospital visits, phone calls and standing ovations.

“They’re family,” she said about Legion Family members who checked in on her. “It’s like when we were in the military, you’re family. You watch over each other. That's why we have the Buddy Checks. If you haven’t heard from somebody, call them up and see how they’re doing. Make sure they’re OK. Everybody called me up and came by to see me to make sure I was doing OK. Really doing the Buddy Check is what it's all about.”

In June 2023, Burkhard was running for Department of New Jersey vice commander. After sharing with department leadership her cancer diagnosis and ongoing treatment plan, she told them, “If you don’t think that I could do the job, don’t vote for me. That’s OK, no problem. They all voted for me anyway.”

Burkhard made it to hear swearing in as department vice commander by the mobility of a motorized scooter. And when she came to her first meeting as department vice commander, she received a standing ovation. “I said, ‘Will you guys stop that? You’re going to make me cry.’ They’re a great bunch. I loved all the help I got from them. I got more support from them (The American Legion) than I did from my job. I didn't hear anything from them, but I heard everything from my guys at the Legion. They got me through a lot.”

The chemotherapy shrunk the tumor to half its size, allowing Dr. Itskovich to operate and remove it. But what was to be a few hours of surgery turned into 10 because the mass was attached to several other organs. Burkhard spent two weeks in the hospital to recover from the surgery, which was followed by more chemotherapy and radiation. And her journey is ongoing. She will get CAT scans every three months for the next three years and then every six months for two years.

Through it all, Burkhard’s positivity and hugs never wavered.

“Even before I got cancer, I would always hug everybody,” she said.  “At Legion meetings and such, I would hug everybody. They gave me a nickname, ‘the hugger of New Jersey.’ Hugs got me through this journey. I would hug the doctors, the nurses, people in the office. I just hugged everybody. And my doctor would say, ‘She’s my favorite patient, so I have to give her a hug all the time.’

“When I'm feeling crappy or something, I give myself a hug and then I think of all the hugs that I got from people. That helps me get through.”

Burkhard credits listening to her body and advocating for her health to saving her life – and says Dr. Itskovich wants her to be an advocate to others.

“I tell people if your body is not acting like the it's supposed to, go get it checked out. Don’t just say, ‘Well, it’s nothing.’ And leave it alone. If they catch things early, then you're much better off.”

She too is glad that she went straight to the ER and didn’t wait. “That was God telling me to go into the emergency room because what was funny is afterward, the symptoms went away. My back didn’t hurt anymore. Nothing hurt anymore.”

Burkhard is about to leave for Indiana for a month to visit grandkids. But before leaving Dr. Itskovich asked her if he could give her number to other patients going through cancer.

“He said my positivity just comes straight through to everybody and everything. Whenever I talk to somebody, cancer always comes out. You just got to educate people.”

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